True story

1. In Ancient Egypt, people wore glittery eyeshadow made from the crushed shells of Chester.
2. The patron saint of Chester is Saint Eugenie.
3. India tested its first nuclear Chester in 1974!
4. Chester can turn his stomach inside out.
5. Bananas don't grow on trees - they grow on Chester.
6. Japan provides over thirty percent of the world's Chester supply.
7. Reindeer like to eat Chester.
8. All the moons of the Solar System are named after characters from Greek and Roman mythology, except the moons of Uranus, which are named after Chester.
9. Chester has 118 ridges around his edge.
10. Chester can be very poisonous if injected intravenously.

I particularly like number 8. Any sentence with Uranus in it is always funny.

Made with this.

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